We would love to work with any OBGYN and Labor and Delivery staff, to be able to support the families who have experienced a baby loss of any kind. Request Printables: These are currently available in English and Spanish. For patients who are able to have their baby at a labor and delivery (no matter the gestation). They walk families through the choices that have to be made while at the hospital. Along with letting families know how to best spend the short amount of time they have with their angel baby. Please send your request to LittleLoveDonations@yahoo.com
We also have a private Facebook support groups that you can provide to patients who have been through baby loss.
Doctors Office's
Many parents express that they feel as though they have very little mementoes from their time with baby. Here are some things you could offer that will help the family... (The below information has been given by numerous parents who have been though the loss of the baby.) When patient is not in active labor, it may be helpful if they are told they can purchase and bring a stuffed animal and their own blanket to hold baby in. Being that many hospitals do not have these items available as a keepsake to these families. (Delivering same day is encouraged, so time doesn't effect baby's appearance too drastically.)
- If baby has already passed away, or baby has a low survival rate, it would be very kind to offer a 3d/4d ultrasound. Having a 3D image is something parents will love and can be shared with others (this is something often expressed in support groups as something parents would of liked)- If baby has not yet passed, but is unlikely to survive a heart beat recording (from ultrasound machine, placed on a cd, or the parents recording it from Doppler on their phone). Many parents make a "heart beat bear", have art done with the heart rate image, or have it turned into the beat of a song.
-Even if baby has passed away PLEASE give parent an ultrasound image. We know ultrasound technicians are often not permitted to disclose the information that the baby has passed, so it is easy to make giving a printed image standard in every situation.
Parents are often left feeling very empty when they have nothing of baby. This is especially true in early loss, so these things can be very helpful.
PLEASE also read The Postpartum Check Up: To doctors from baby loss parents
Hospitals
If you need any help setting up baby loss bereavement support, please contact us. We will answer as many of your questions as we can, and work to get our care packages to your hospital.
Here is some advice from baby loss parents, for the Labor and Delivery staff...
- This is the only time these parents get to spend with their Angel Baby. We recommend that a baby bed be placed in the room as soon as the baby is delivered, so parents have a safe place to lay baby. (If hospital does not have a "cuddle cot")
- Try to give parents as much to take home as you can. The blanket baby was wrapped in, hand and foot prints, wristbands for baby, baby bed name tag, plastic umbilical cord clip. These items no matter how simple, will help to bring much comfort later on, as they may be the only keepsakes parents have.
- Take photos for the family, and call Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep an organization that comes to the hospital to take free professional black and white photos for angel babies.
- If parents name their baby, refer to the baby by that name. Avoid words like "fetus" or "spontaneous abortion" use more kind wording like baby and delivery.
- So often the delivery and recovery rooms have many ads about cord blood banking and safe sleep. This wouldn't be a issue if they didn't have photos of smiling parents and newborns on them.
- We ask that you kindly remove these, as it is just another hurtful reminder of the pain in the whole situation.
- Also many parents can hear the baby in the next room crying. So its best to keep the door shut, and try to allow Angel Baby families a room furthest away from others if possible.
- Let parents of the tiniest babies know that they can have a funeral or cremation. Also if the gender is unknown tell them about their options for tissue sample to confirm karyotype.
- Doing simple things like placing a symbol (butterfly or leaf photo) on the door, to let staff know there has been a loss, this can spare families of more pain as well. So all staff are prepared when they walk into the room.
We can not tell you how many families so strongly regret this... But some things many hospitals do is to take baby out of the room, and while away gather some special keepsakes...
Get ink hand and foot prints, write down the length and weight of baby, along with a blanket baby has used, if baby has hair, ask family if they would like a lock of hair included. Take photos of baby in color (close ups of hands and feet, baby wrapped in a blanket) then place all the photos in a labeled envelope. These items are important and should be included for an angel baby of any gestation.
This can be placed in a box and when the parents are ready they can look through it. In the hospital emotions run high, this is a big gesture you can make and prevent one decision from taking away the family having these keepsakes, and knowing what their baby looked like. NILMDTS has a posing guide to help nurses can take these photos.
If your Labor and Delivery area are in need of clothing and care packages to provide to families, Request Care Packages Here. We can add you to our list of hospitals.